a tiny part of me says yes.
Thứ Hai, 13 tháng 3, 2017
Angela Merkel visits Donald Trump in Washington
During her stay Trump asks her: "Tell me Chancellor Merkel, what's the secret of your years of success?"
Chancellor Merkel responds: "Well I have always surrounded myself with intelligent people."
"Very interesting", says Trump, "but how exactly do you know if they are intelligent?"
"Well I just ask them a couple of simple questions. By their response I can quickly determine whether someone is intelligent or not."
"Would you mind showing me how to do that?" Trump asks.
Angela picks up the phone and calls Wolfgang Schäuble, her Minister of Finance and asks: "it's the son of your father but it's not your brother. Who is it?" The Minister replies: "That's easy, it's obviously me!"
Totally impressed Trump returns to the oval office and calls up his Vice-president Michael Pence. "Mike I have a question for you. It's the son of your father but it's not your brother. Who is it?" Micheal stalls for a moment, not knowing the answer. He tells Trump that he will sleep over it.
In the morning he wakes up still without a solution. So he rings up Barack Obama and passes the riddle to him. Obama immediately respons: "Well that's me!"
Relieved Michael calls up Trump and exclaims: "I got the answer to your question...it's Barack Obama!!!"
After a moment of silence, Trump explodes: "No you idiot, it's Wolfgang Schäuble!!!"
A Mexican attempts to pass the border
A border control officer catches them and says, "Papers."
The Mexican replied, "Scissors."
The border control officer replied,"Dammit! Well, you're free to go!"
I found my son hanging from a rope in his bedroom.
On the floor was a note saying, "I can't stand the critism anymore."
I quickly cut him down, gave him CPR and he started to breathe.
As he lay in my arms I saw his eyes slowly open and I said, "That's not how you spell criticism."
50 Bucks is 50 bucks!
Ken and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year, And every year Ken would say, 'Edna, I'd like to ride in that helicopter' Edna always replied, 'I know Ken, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, And fifty bucks is fifty bucks' One year Ken and Edna went to the fair, and Ken said, 'Edna, I'm 75 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance' To this, Edna replied "Ken that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks' The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny! But if you say one word it's fifty dollars.' Ken and Edna agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, But still not a word... When they landed, the pilot turned to Ken and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed! Ken replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Edna fell out, But you know, "Fifty bucks is fifty bucks!"
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