I'll admit, it was a lame ass excuse.
Thứ Sáu, 9 tháng 11, 2018
The boss with no ears
Three men are waiting outside the office of an executive for a job interview. The first man goes to walk in, but the receptionist stops him and says, “Just so you know, the boss has no ears. He’s really sensitive about it, so don’t let him know that you know.” The man thanks her and goes in and sits down. The boss says, “What’s the first thing you notice about me?” The man says, flustered, “You have no ears.” The boss says, “Get the hell out of here.”
The second man gets up to walk in, and again the receptionist stops him and says, “Just so you know, the boss has no ears. He’s really sensitive about it, so don’t let him know that you know.” The man thanks her and goes in and sits down. The boss says, “What’s the first thing you notice about me?” The man pauses, anxious, sweating – finally he says, “You have no ears.” The boss says, even angrier, “Get the hell out of here!”
The third man gets up to walk in, and again the receptionist stops him and says, “Just so you know, the boss has no ears. He’s really sensitive about it, so don’t let him know that you know.” The man thanks her and goes in and sits down. The boss says, “What’s the first thing you notice about me?” The man says, “That you wear contacts.” The boss is stunned; he even tears up and says, “No one has ever noticed. How did you know?” The man says, “Well you can’t wear glasses, you have no ears.”
This Is Where Your Wool Comes From
This Is Where Your Wool Comes From
The eight Peruvian immigrants who work as shepherds on the S. Martinez ranch in Washington have a colossal job: keep about 4,000 animals safe from predators so their wool can be harvested in the spring for companies like Pendleton and Woolrich.
November 8, 2018 at 07:58AM
via Digg https://ift.tt/2FapSqX
Some dude dies and goes to Hell
"Oh shit"
"Na", says the Devil, "Don't listen to that Abraham fella, we actually have a lot of fun down here! Do you like bacon?"
"Of course"
"Well", continues the Devil, "You'll love Mondays then! Everybody gets a pallet of bacon and you eat until you can't eat anymore! The best part is, it doesn't matter if you have a heart attack 'cos you're already dead!"
"Hmm, I could get used to that"
"Great!", smiles the Devil, "Do you like gambling?"
"I'm partial to a bit of Blackjack, yea"
"Then I have some good news for you", explains the Devil, "Every Tuesday we go to the largest casino in the multiverse and you gamble until you can't gamble anymore! The best part is, it doesn't matter if you go bankrupt 'cos you're already dead!"
"OK, this is starting to sound pretty good"
"I knew you'd come 'round", replies the Devil, "Now, do you like drugs?"
"Yea I am a junkie"
"Fantastic!", exclaims the Devil, "You'll be looking forward to Wednesday! Everybody gets a great big bowl of smack and you smoke until you can't smoke anymore! The best part is, it doesn't matter if you overdose 'cos you're already dead!"
"Can this place get any better?"
"You bet!", replies the Devil, "Do you like sodomy?"
"Um...no"
"Oh", the Devil trails off, "Thursdays are going to be tough on you then".
Đăng ký:
Nhận xét (Atom)