FunnyStory about animals and all around the world
Funny Video about animals and all around the world! :)
Funny picture about animals and all around the world :)
Play game and comfortable :)
Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.
Shes hears a knock on the door and a man says "can i come in".
"who are you?" she asks nervously.
"Im the blind man" he replies.
"Oh well in that case come in" she says relieved.
The man walks in.
"Nice tits" he says "Now where shall I hang these blinds?"
Everywhere he went, people pretended they were choking to see what he would do. One day, he visited England. During a banquet with the royal family, the Queen grabbed her throat and bent over. Heimlich ignored her, and she confessed that she was faking. Later, he passed a prince on the street, and the prince made a similar gesture, but again Heimlich ignored him.
This continued with a duke, a Duchess, and an Earl. Every time, Heimlich continued on without giving them another thought.
Late in the evening, Heimlich saw a poor farmer who was holding his throat. He rushed over to him and performed his famous life-saving maneuver. A piece of bread flew from the farmer’s mouth, and he begin gasping for breath.
All of the people were amazed. A small boy walked up to him and said, “Mr. Heimlich, you ignored the queen when she pretended to be choking. You also ignored the prince, the duke, the Duchess, and the Earl. How did you know that the farmer actually needed your help?” Henry Heimlich looked down at him and smiled. “The real choke is always in the commons,” he said.
There’s a girl with no arms and legs laying by a pool.
She's tanning and enjoying herself when a handsome guy walks by and grabs her attention.
She yells over to him and asks if he can help her with something.
The guy feels bad for her so he walks over and asks her what she needs.
She says, “Well you see…I’m a virgin, and you are a very good looking guy."
The guy looks at her confused as to what she is hinting at.
She continues, "I've never had sex before, and I've always wanted to get fucked."
The guy responds, "Oh I see what you mean now."
So he throws her in the pool and says, “Now you’re fucked.”
"I've been to so many specialists and no one can seem to get rid of it."
The doctor thinks for a few moments and says, "OK, come back next week with a banana and a cookie."
The man is confused but, having been failed by every conventional treatment, goes home and returns a week later with a banana and a cookie.
"Drop your pants and bend over the table," says the doctor.
"What the hell are you doing?" the man asks.
"Trust me," says the doctor.
The man, a little distressed, does as he's asked.
The doctor shoves the banana up his ass and then a couple of minutes later shoves the cookie up as well.
"Come back in a week with another banana and cookie."
The man is unsure about the treatment but, again, has tried everything else and wants to get rid of this tapeworm.
The next week he returns with another banana and cookie.
"Drop your pants and bend over the table," says the doctor.
After 3 weeks of this the doctor says, "OK, next week will be your final treatment. Bring me a banana and a hammer."
The man comes back with the requested items.
"Drop your pants and bend over the table."
Trembling, knowing what's coming, the man does as he's asked.
The doctor shoves the banana up his ass and waits... and waits... and waits...
Eventually, the tapeworm sticks its head out and yells, "Where's my cookie?"
And the doctor smashes it with the hammer.