Mom: No, no, why would you think that?
Dad: It was a more of a tragedy, really.
Thứ Tư, 16 tháng 10, 2019
Little Suzie walks in on her parents having sex.
She's told to wait downstairs. Her mother comes down first and tries to console her.
Mommy, what were you doing to daddy?
Well sweetheart, you know how your father's a little overweight? Every day I bounce up and down on top of him to let some of the air out.
The little girl starts laughing.
What's so funny hunny?
You're wasting your time mommy. Every day when you go to work, the neighbor comes over and blows him right back up!
A cowboy walks into a bar, and two steps in he realizes it’s a gay bar:
"What the heck." He says to himself. "I really want a drink."
When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy. "What’s the name of your willy?"
The cowboy says. "Look, I’m not into any of that. All I want is a drink."
"The gay waiter says. "I’m sorry but I can’t serve you until you tell me the name of your willy. Mine for instance is called NIKE, for the slogan, 'Just Do It.' that guy down at the end of the bar calls his SNICKERS, because 'It really Satisfies.'"
The cowboy looks dumbfounded, so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over.
So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left who is sipping on a beer. "Hey bud, what’s the name of yours?"
The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX."
The thirsty cowboy asks. "Why Timex?"
The fella proudly replies. "‘Cause it takes a licking and keeps on ticking."
A little shaken, the cowboy turns to the two fella’s on his right who just happens to be sharing a fruity Margarita and says.....
"So, what do you guys call yours?"
The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims. "FORD, because Quality is Job One." Then he adds. "Have you driven a Ford lately?"
The guy next to him then says. "I call mine CHEVY Like a Rock!" And gives a wink!
Even more shaken, the Cowboy has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his manhood.
Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my willy is SECRET. Now give me a beer."
The bartender begins to pour the cowboy a beer, but with a puzzled look asks. "Why Secret?"
The cowboy says. "Because it’s ‘STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"
Husband doing crossword with his wife
Husband: Emphatic no, five letters.
Wife: Never
H: Pistol, 3 letters.
W: Gun
H: Disgust, 3 letters.
W: Ugh
H: Charity, 4 letters.
W: Give
H: Female sheep, 3 letters
W: Ewe
H: Pixar movie, 2 letters
W: Up
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