Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Năm, 2 tháng 7, 2020

If your Doctor spoke like Trump

So it seems you’ve tested positive for the Chinese virus, the so-called Covid NINETEEN, the Corona—nobody knows what to call it, quite frankly. It’s the most amazing thing, no one knew anything about Corona until a few weeks ago. But the moment I heard about it—the Wuhan flu; it’s also the Wuhan, or WuHAAN—that’s a city in China. Many people don’t know that. But the moment I heard about this Chinese flu, I ordered a test. And it’s an amazing test. We do better testing than anywhere in the world. Some say the Germans have the best tests, but they...

An airplane was about to crash. There were 4 passengers on board, but only 3 parachutes.

​ The 1st passenger said, 'I am Steph Curry, the best NBA basketball player. The Warriors and my millions of fans need me, and I can't afford to die.' So he took the 1st pack and left the plane. The 2nd passenger, Donald Trump, said, 'I am the newly-elected US President, and I am the smartest President in American history, so my people don't want me to die.' He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane. The 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10-year-old schoolboy, 'My son, I am old and don't have many years left, you...

Yesterday I spotted an albino dalmatian

It was the least I could do for the guy...

An English man, a Scottish man, and an Irish man all make plans to book into the same hotel but on 3 different nights

When the English man arrives at the hotel, the manager tells him that there is one room available, it already has a female guest, and there's only one double bed, the English man isn't bothered by this and walks up to his room, he opens the door and there's a woman lay on the bed...she opens her legs a little and says "you know what I want"...the English man with a big smile on his face says "I sure do" and they begin to have sex...he then leaves in the morning The Scottish man arrives at the hotel, and the manager tells him the same exact thing,...

An Englishman, an American and a Japanese guy are on a boat, moments away from plunging over a waterfall to their doom...

Suddenly a genie appears. The genie explains that he is of limited power. He cannot prevent their inevitable deaths, but he can grant each man one wish before he dies. The American steps up first. 'I love my country. Before I die I want to sing my national anthem one last time. The full version. Give my friends lyrics sheets, so they can join in. I want a full backing orchestra. A gospel choir. When we reach the crescendo I want to fire an AR15 into the air, to celebrate our God given rights to bear arms' It will be done, says the genie The Japanese...

All my years of phone sex finally caught up with me

I have hearing aids...

A man takes a hooker out to dinner. He gives her his peas

She gives him herpes...