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Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.

Thứ Năm, 22 tháng 4, 2021

A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?

The boyfriend says Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again.

A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in New York and laid down on the back seat.

The cab driver, an old Jewish gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman.

He made no attempt to start the cab.

The woman glared back at him and said, “What’s wrong with you, honey? Haven’t you ever seen a naked woman before?”

The old Jewish driver answered, “Let me tell you sumsing, lady I vasn’t staring at you like you tink; det vould not be proper vair I come from.”

The drunk woman giggled and responded, “Well, if you’re not staring at my boobs or ass, Sweetie, what are you doing then?”

He paused a moment, then told her…”Vell, M’am, I am looking and I am looking, and I am tinking to myself, ‘Vair in DA hell is dis lady keeping de money to pay for dis ride?”

On the first day of my flying lessons, I looked down nervously and asked my copilot, “What are all these buttons for?”

He said, “Those are to keep your shirt closed.”

So Tod goes to a new truckers joint...

He sits down and the waiter approaches him.

Do you want to hear the daily specials sir? He asks.

"No thank you", says Todd, "let me smell your hand and I'll tell you want I'd like today".

So the waiter reluctantly proceeds to offer his hand to be smelled by this weird customer.

Todd says, I'll have the fried chicken with spicy paprika mashed potatoes.

The waiter is impressed, he thinks to himself: how does this guys know that's on the menu!

Todd has his lunch, pays the check and leaves.

Next day, Todd walks in again, and again he asks to smell the same waiter's hand.

This day, he says, I'll have the catfish with a side of salad.

Again, the waiter is dumbfounded by this guy's sense of smell. Todd gets his lunch, eats it, pays the bill and leaves.

The next day, surely Todd walks in, but this time the waiter has something planned.

The waiter goes to the kitchen and says to the kitchen lady, "ok Mary, come here" he proceeds to put his hand under her skirt (you know where) and goes to attend Todd.

Would you like to hear today's specials? says the Waiter

No, thank you, let me smell your hand and I'll tell you what I'll have.

So the waiter offers his hand with a smirk in his face, Todd smells it and exclaims:

"I didn't know Mary worked here!"

(hope it translates well)

A woman goes into Bass Pro Shop to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday

A woman goes into Bass Pro Shop to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter. A Bass Pro Shop associate is standing there wearing dark shades.

She says, ’Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?'

He says, 'Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you

Everything from the sound it makes.'

She doesn’t believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.

He says, 'That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-LB. Test line. It's a good all around combination and it’s on sale this week for only $20.00.

She says, 'It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!' As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor.

'Oh, that sounds like a Master Card,' he says.

She bends down to pick it up and accidentally farts. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.

The man rings up the sale and says, 'That'll be $34.50 please..' The woman is totally confused by this and asks, 'Didn't you tell me the rod and reel were on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?'

He replies, 'Yes, Ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00,but the Duck Call is $11.00 and the Bear Repellent is $3.50

What is Earth's favorite pastime?

Making fun of other planets for having no life.

What do you get if you eat 3.14 desserts?

You probably get Fat.

What? were you expecting a pi joke?

Not on my cake day!