Drive a steak through it's heart...
Thứ Sáu, 7 tháng 5, 2021
A barbarian slave in Rome somehow won the attention of Caesar's daughter
They became lovers. To avoid pregnancy, they agreed to oral sex only. After just a few encounters, they were caught in the act. At first the barbarian, imprisoned and sentenced to fight to entertain the crowd, regretted his poor judgment.
Eventually, though, he was gladiator....
There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength.
News began to circulate of a Russian wrestler who was fierce and unstoppable. As each wrestlers legends grew, a match was set up between the two, America versus Russia. The match would be held in Texas.
John began training immediately. Every day his coach would tell him, “This Russ
ian has a move called the Mongolian Death Grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian Death Grip. DO NOT let him get you in the Mongolian Death Grip”
The day of the match finally came. Just before each wrestler stepped onto the mat in front of the capacity crowd, the...
A pregnant lady expecting triplets is tragically shot during a bank robbery
She was shot 3 times in the belly, and 1 bullet hit each of the 3 baby boys. Miraculously, they all survived!
One day about 14 years later, one of her boys came crying to her saying “mom, I was peeing and a bullet came out of my penis”. Then she sat him down and explained what happened all those years ago and told him he is a miracle and then he calmed down.
A few weeks later her other son came crying saying “mom, I was peeing and a bullet came out of my penis”. She did the same thing and told the same story, calmed him down and told him he was...
A policeman was interviewing 3 guys who want to become detectives.
To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first guys a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The second guy smiles, flips his...
A guy from IRS shows up at the rabbi's house
"So, you produce a lot of waste during your ceremonies that could potentially be sold for profit but it's missing from your books, how do you account for that?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, the matzo bread you eat... It's awfully dry, it must surely leave a lot of crumbs... What do you do with that?"
"We just collect the crumbs, send them to IRS and within a year, they send us another full matzo."
"I see... And the last bits of the candles?"
"We collect them, send them to the IRS, they melt it down, and within a year, they send us a full candle."
"I...
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