There’s no winning, it’s just about how long you last...
Thứ Bảy, 17 tháng 7, 2021
When I was about 9 years old
When I was about 9 years old, I accompanied my father to the funeral of a friend of his, someone who I didn't even know.
When we got there, I stayed in a corner waiting for the time to pass.
Then a man approached me and said, 'Enjoy life kid, be happy because time flies. Look at me now, I didn't enjoy it.'
Then he passed his hand over my head and left. My father, before leaving, forced me to say goodbye to the dead person.
When I looked in the coffin, I was horrified to see that the man in the coffin was the same man who had spoken to me!
I was...
Thứ Sáu, 16 tháng 7, 2021
"How would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"
While teaching a class a teacher trying to teach good manners asked her students the following question:
"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"
Michael said: "Just a minute I have to go pee."
The teacher responded by saying: "That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?"
Sherman said: "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back."
"That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom...
One unfortunate night, a pregnant woman gets shot 3 times in the stomach,
She goes to the doctor and luckily everything was fine. She gave birth to triplets, all healthy. 2 girls and one boy.
......fast forward 15 years later......
One girl rushed to her mother and complained "mom, I was peeing today and a bullet came out" The mother sat her down and explained everything to her. The next day, the other girl came rushing to her mother with the same complaint "mom, i was peeing today and a bullet came out. Again, the mother sat her down and explained everything that happened. The next day the boy came rushing to his mother,...
My girlfriend's dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one.
It just made her more upset.
She screamed at me, "What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?"...
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