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Thứ Năm, 14 tháng 4, 2016

Donald Trump's doctor has recently prescribed him Prozac.

He told him it would help him control hispanics.

So a guy walks into a bank in Manhattan and asks for the loan officer

The loan officer comes over immediately.

“How can I help you, sir?” he asks.

“I’m going out of town on business for two weeks and need to borrow $5,000,” the man answers.

The loan officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan.

So, the man holds out his hand and opens his palm, saying, “These are the keys to my car, which is sitting out front.”

“Here are the documents, as well,” he says as he hands over a tiny stack of papers.

The loan officer peeks out the window and sees a brand new Ferrari parallel parked directly in front of the bank.

“One moment, please.”

The loan officer walks into a back office to consult with the president of the bank. Everything checks out.

So, after sharing a laugh with the president at this man leaving a $750,000 car as security for a $5,000 loan, the loan officer returns and tells the man that they will happily accept the Ferrari.

An employee of the bank then drives the car into the bank’s underground garage and parks it.

Two weeks later, the man returns and pays the $5,000 plus interest, which comes to $15.41.

The loan officer smiles and says, “Sir, we are very happy to have your business. This transaction has worked out very nicely.”

Then he adds, “But to be honest, we are a little bit puzzled.”

“While you were away, we checked you out and found out that you are a multi-millionaire. So what puzzled us is why you’d bother to borrow $5,000?”

The man replies, “Where else in Manhattan can I park my car for two weeks for just $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?”

A pun loving old man forgot to order his tombstone before he passed away

This was a grave mistake

(Star Wars) If Finn and Rey hooked up and had a child

The child would definitely be on the dark side

what do you call a magical dog?

A Labracadabrador.

Tell a sad story in 4 words

Lifetime Cleveland Browns fan

Menstruation is NOT a laughing matter.

Period.