Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Ba, 19 tháng 4, 2016

I've never owned a telescope...

But it's something I'm thinking of looking into...

I just summarized the jokes I liked best in a recent Askreddit thread. Have fun!

I hope that's fitting in the Subreddit. If not, leave a downvote please. -Remains to be seen if glass coffins become popular. -I have a phobia of over-engineered buildings - its a complex complex complex. -I have an L shaped couch... Lower case. -I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn't complain. -A man walked into his house and was delighted when he discovered that someone had stolen all of his lamps. -I, for one, like Roman numerals. -You can never lose a homing pigeon - if your homing pigeon doesn't come back, what...

What's Hitler's least favorite planet?

Jewpiter....

This was Actually Said..

This was actually said in court and taken from a transcript: Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?" Witness: "No." Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?" Witness: "No." Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?" Witness: "No." Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?" Witness: "No." Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?" Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar." Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?" Witness:...

How many dead hookers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I don't know, but it's not five, because my basement is still dark....

Lets go to the symphony

Beethoven: You guys want some symphonies tonight!? Crowd: cheers loudly Beethoven: I can't hear you!...

"Yes I have reservations but I'll eat here anyway."

my dad to every hostess ever ...