This Poor Farmer Has Literally The Shittiest Day Ever At Work
Nothing to make you feel more cowed at work than being in the firing line of a cow's projectile poop.
May 23, 2019 at 07:34PM
via Digg http://bit.ly/2Wklpt6
Thứ Sáu, 24 tháng 5, 2019
This Poor Farmer Has Literally The Shittiest Day Ever At Work
This Poor Farmer Has Literally The Shittiest Day Ever At Work
Nothing to make you feel more cowed at work than being in the firing line of a cow's projectile poop.
May 23, 2019 at 07:34PM
via Digg http://bit.ly/2Wklpt6
A man goes to the Council to apply for a job
The interviewer asks him, ''Are you allergic to anything?''
He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee.''
''OK, have you ever been in the military service?''
he says, ''l was in Iraq for one tour.'' The interviewer says, ''That will give you 5 extra points toward employment.'' The interviewer then asks, ''Are you disabled in any way?''
The man says, ''Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles.''
The interviewer grimaces and then says, ''Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. You can start tomorrow at 10 a.m., and plan on starting at 10 a.m. every day."
The man is puzzled and asks, ''If the work hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., why don't you want me here until 10?"
''This is a government job," the interviewer says. ''For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."
I told you I was broke
A little lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
"Good morning" said the young man. "If I can take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high power vacuum cleaner"
"Go away" said the old lady. "I'm broke and haven't got any money!" She proceeds to close the door.
Quick as a flash the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open."Don't be too hasty!" He said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration."
And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure on to her hallway carpet. "If this vacuum does not remove all traces of manure from your carpet, madam, I will personally eat the remainder."
The old lady stepped back and said "well let me get you a fork, cause they cut off my electricity this morning.
Credits goes to the homemade humor.
Sadly their site isn't around any more so I thought I can share some of their best works with you all.
Thứ Năm, 23 tháng 5, 2019
Three men die and go to heaven. St. Peter meets them at the pearly gates.
He says to the first man, "Welcome to Heaven! Back on Earth, what denomination were you?"
The first man say, "I was a devout Presbyterian".
St. Peter says, "Excellent! Then go to door 10, but when you pass door number 2, be very quiet."
He then asks the second man, "When you were on Earth, what denomination were you?"
The second man replies, "I was the pastor of my Methodist church!"
St. Peter says, "Wonderful! Make your way to door 6, but when you pass door 2, be very quiet."
St. Peter asks the last man, "What denomination were you on Earth?"
The man says, "I was Lutheran. Part of the Missouri Synod."
St. Peter says, "You know the drill. Go to door 12, but be very quiet when you pass door 2."
The last man says, "Why is it we need to be so quiet when we go past door 2?"
St. Peter replies, "Because that's where the Catholics are and they think they're the only ones here."
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