A man is driving along a country road and sees a sign; "$5 for talking dog, take next left."

Thinking this is some sort of joke, the man decides to check it out. So the man takes the left onto a a farm, and a farmer comes out.

F: You here about the dog?

M: Yeah, does the dog really talk?

F: Sure does, come here and I'll show ya.

The man and the farmer walk to the garage, where a dog is lying on a dog bed. It sees them and walks over to them.

F: Go on, ask him anything.

The man says;

M: Alright dog, tell me about yourself.

To the mans surprise, the dog begins to speak, clearly and with proper words, not the typical "arooo you" that you usually hear on the internet.

D: Well, when I was a young pup, I always wanted to serve my country. So, as soon as I could, I enlisted with the airport security as a sniffer dog. I was real good at my job too, got a few promotions and turned some heads. Eventually, the US army picked me up as a bomb-sniffer dog, and I helped prevent tragedies all across the country and oversees. After a while I retired, found myself a nice girl, had a few pups, and finally came to this farm to live out my golden years.

The man is stunned. He says to the farmer:

M: Holy cow, you were right! Why are you only asking $5 for this dog!?

F: Cause he's a liar! He ain't ever done any of that!