A pianist is applying for a job playing piano in a fancy restaurant.

So the manager takes him up to the piano and says 'OK show me what you can do'

The pianist says

'Sure, but the music might be unfamiliar to you because I only play my own compositions'

The manager says

'That's no problem, take it away'

The pianist begins to play the most emotionally stirring piece of music the manager has ever heard. It's achingly beautiful and almost brings a tear to the managers eye.

Choking back tears the manager says 'That is beautiful, what to do you call it?'

The pianist replies 'I fucked your mother in the ass and she shit on my balls'

The manager is slightly taken aback and says

'Well that is quite the title...Can you play something else?'

The pianist begins to play. Again the music is hauntingly beautiful, it's as though angels from heaven were dancing on the keys

The manager, again holding back tears asks what it's called. The pianist replies

'There's blood on my cock from fucking your slut sister on her period'

The manager is again taken aback and asks him to play a final piece. This piece is even more beautiful than the last, and again the manager asks what it is called. The pianist replies

'You shoved your shit into your grandmothers cunt, while I fucked your grandfather in the mouth'

The manager replies

'Well, I'm going to have to hire you even if your titles are somewhat unusual. You can start this Friday'

So Friday rolls around and the pianist arrives and is seated at his piano about to play when a woman with huge breasts and a low cut top walks by. The pianist is intensely aroused, and quickly runs off to the toilet to masturbate. He quickly finishes and is running back to the piano, unfortunately forgetting to clean himself up properly.

As he is just about to sit back down at the piano a woman comes up to him and says,

'Excuse me sir, do you know your cock is hanging out and there is semen all over your pants?'

The pianist replies,

'Know it?...I fucking wrote it!'