Joe loved his dog. Only one problem - his dog wasn’t housebroken. Joe tried everything, read every dog training book, bought every device on the market. But the dog was untrainable. Finally, he saw an ad for a pet shop that guaranteed results. Desperate, he gave it a try.
The pet shop was very weird. Inside, half the shop was full of bones and dog treats. The other half of the shop was full of dildos, sex toys, and lubricant. It seemed the shop sold both. In the middle, behind the register, was a pleasant-looking man holding an old leather book.
Joe asked if the man could help train his dog.
“Sure can,” he said. “See, this book is a magical training manual, and I rent it out. You take it home and read the first page aloud to your dog. And then the book gives your dog whatever he wants in order for him to do whatever you’re trying to train him to do. Works almost every time. Just make sure you have plenty of space.”
With nothing to lose, Joe rented the book. A few days later he comes back and slaps the old leather book down onto the counter.
“Well, my dog is house trained now,” said Joe. “Only problem is my house is filled top to bottom with meat. Thousands and thousands of steaks, hot dogs, and pork chops. What the hell am I supposed to do with all of it?”
“Do the same thing I did,” said the shopkeeper. “Open a business. My dog wanted more treats than he could ever possibly eat. And turns out my cat wanted me to go fuck myself.”
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