I’m surprised that 'Call 911' didn’t make the cut.
Thứ Năm, 30 tháng 1, 2020
Two Gay men are on a long overnight flight.
One gay man says to the other "Hey you want to join the mile high club right here?"
The other gay man replied "Here? We will get caught!"
The first man smiles and says "Relax everyone is asleep. Watch" he then stands up and says "Does anyone have a pencil?" To which he recieves no response. This is enough for the other gay man who stands up and gets behind the man at which point they have sex.
A few hours later a flight attendant walking down the down the aisle see an old man who has thrown up all over himself. She asks the man "Sir why didn't you ask for a vomit bag?"
To which the old man replied "Well the last guy asked for a pencil and he got fucked in the ass"
Does your dick touch your asshole?
A father and son are sitting on the porch and the father starts drinking a beer.
Son: "Hey Dad, can I try a sip of your beer?"
Father: "Tell me son... does your dick touch your asshole?"
Son: "No, it doesn't."
Father: "Then no, you can't have any."
The father finishes his beer and lights up a cigarette.
Son: "Dad, can I try your cigarette?"
Father: "Does your dick touch your asshole?"
Son: "No."
Father: "Then you can't try it."
The pair head to a convenience store to pick up more beer and smokes. The father decides to buy a couple scratch tickets and gives one to his son. They scratch away and the father's is a loser, but the son wins $500.
Father: "Say boy, I bought that ticket for you. You're going to share that with me, right?"
Son: "I don't know, Dad. Does your dick touch your asshole?"
Father, proudly: "Why yes it does!"
Son: "Good, go fuck yourself."
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